The awakening of 2022

WOW, as much as I realized I pretty much let this blog go, I'm always shocked at how long it's been since I wrote on it. Today, the final day of 2022 felt like a good day to check in and appreciate how far I've come, even in just 2022. It's interesting re-reading my last post - focused so much on what feels like the never ending journey of dating. I say that because my entire lifetime I've been dating, or in my language, seeking out my person. And while I knew this already about 2022, reflecting on it in the context of this blog and that last post is powerful becuase this year it all truly shifted for me. It all started in January while I was visiting the "big island" of Hawaii. I spent 5 days at a yoga retreat on the northern tip of the island and then went down to Kona and used hotel points to lounge by the pool/beach and drink pina coloadas. I also had a coach colleague there who knows the island quite well and we got to hit some local spots together, enjoy some lovely dinners and even better sunsets. While I was there I did some soul searching, had Raki done at the retreat center by a magical and sage woman, and even spoke to a giant rock named Grandma TuTu who's over 2,000 years old and hands out some real wisdom if you can get close enough and quiet enough to listen.

I visited TuTu very early one morning just as the sun began to rise - I wanted to be in the meadow before anyone else and ensure she and I could have a conversation. I had an important question for her. I got there in this beautiful and peaceful meadow surrounded by lushness and flowers and I placed both my hands on TuTu to say hello. I immediately felt a connection and felt compelled to lay my entire chest on her and embrace this rock. So I did. I hugged the rock and when I closed my eyes - no joke - the fist time in nearly 12 years I swear I felt my own mother hugging me back. I began to cry which turned into sobbing tears and I just allowed that feeling of warm loving embrace to linger. I then asked TuTu - where is my person and what do I need to DO to find him? TuTu said: "my dear jennifer, you don't need to DO anything, you simply need to BE the amazing woman that you are. Keep shinning bright out in the world as you've been and you will attract him right to you. You will have a declicious collision and you will know when it's your man. There is nothing to worry about - just keep on living." Something changed for me that day. After seeing TuTu I also had a raki experience that also re-aligned my shockras, specifically the second (pelvic area) and my throat shockra as well. She said I was blocking my own ability to manifenst what I want and I wasn't putting voice to it. My intiution, heart, etc were all quite strong but my imagination and voice where not aligned to the rest of me. Whatever she did - from that day forward, specifically every day for serveral months, I had the MOST VIVID dreams each night when I slept. In many were people from my past, specifically x boyfriends or men who have hurt me. There was such an incredible sense of clearing of my past and paving the way for what I want for myself as I look ahead.

When I came back to Austin I felt I had been awakened. I had an incredible sense of clarity, of trust, of inner knowing in a way I'm not quite sure I've EVER felt. I returned with a lot of quesitons about my business and if my business partnership still felt right. That led me to invisioning what I wanted my future to look like and putting voice to my inner knowing that it was back running my own company. I returned with an incredibly clear sense of who my person will be and a faith of knowing he and I will have that delicious collision when the timing is right. Until then I for the first time felt truly content dating MYSELF. I came back with a renewed sense of gratitude for being exactly where I was in a life I re-built for myself and one that I love. I had my health, friendships, my family, koko, financial abundence and my beautiful home - I was at peace. YEAR IN REVIEW So the year started off quite strong with my awakening and I did my best to honor those feelings throughout the year. One very challenging aspect of 2022 that I stayed 100% present for was the terrible turn that my dear friend Dave's health took after battling cancer for the better part of 8 months at that point. We thought he kicked it and yet there was another plan. I got to spend an incredibly meaningful weekend in March with he and my best girl Johanna and their two girls and friends who surrounded them on this horrific journey. I was there the week leading into the funeral doing all I could to ensure Johanna could put one foot in front of the other and I just returned from spending Christimas weekend with she and the girls. While it was incredibly hard for all the obvious reasons we made it feel special and there was love at every turn. Dave was an incredible man and like a brother to me and I asked him how I could honor him and he said just keep being there for Jo and my girls - and that I will do for the rest of time.

Coming off of 2020-21 with Covid and reduced travel for all I was intentional this year about seeing and spending time with the people I love the most. I flew to FL to spend a weekend with my best gal Cathy and her family. I flew to Montana to see my best gal Sarah and her hubby and lil one, Rani. I flew to CO to see my niece Marrissa and big sis/cuz Sheryl for the Aspen Jazz fest. After going to NYC for a training I spent a night in NJ with another friend who's battling off Cancer, my dear friend Cath - we had a special time catching up. I flew to Phila for the high school gals reunion down in Avalon NJ which is always a lot of laughs. And I treated myself to a lil vaca in Europe - Lagos Portugal for my friend Julia's 40th. Loved Portugal so much and Can't wait to go back. I got to host my niece Marissa in Austin and take her to some great shows during SXSW. And another successful ACL with my dear friends Shannon and Tony - PINK was epic!

Other highlights - Koko turned 11 and is spunky and happy (and a bit too obseessed with food now) and I love him beyond measure. We went glamping again in Hill Country and celebrated all the holidays together. I made some nice upgrades to the house and am finally furnishing it the way I like - I even fit in an office makeover just before the year ended. I spent a full year focused in CrossFit and got the unexpected bonus of an amazing community and a group of women I now call dear friends. I got to see my youngest niece graduate HS and enjoy a visit with my family in June, including a fun siblings weekend at Jakes lake house. I also got a full week home with them in December celebrating Marissas's 21st and some special time with each of them - love them all so much. Finally, with work, I re-launched out on my own as a new brand: GROW Collective - tribute to Mom <3 and I co-authored a book, Feedback Reimagined coming out on January 18th 2023! It was an incredible nearly 7 years being partnered to Pete, I do believe we helped each other to grow and be even better versions of ourselves. We also, together, shared a methodology with the world that will now and and forever be in print via the book and that feels really good to me. Especially since we are no longer partners - I'm glad that we will always have the book and both our voices represented.

So - one hell of a year. And on the final day of 2022 I want to say thank you for all your gave me. And it's time to set my intention for 2023 - what will it be?