year in review

in no particular order, my download on 2010.

my mom, sadness, grief, the worst year of my life, hospitals, fear, anxiety, tears, strength, courage, doctors, nurses--good ones and not so great ones, funerals, death, empty hospital hallways in the middle of the night, more snow than i've seen in Phila in a long time, cloudy and cool LA summer, old job, new job, no job, dog walking, babysitting, new friends and old friends, my therapist--thank god for her and how she's helped me "move through grief", long dark days, feeling more alone than ever, weekend trips with the gals--Temecula, Sequoia Nat'l Park and Yosemite, camping, Joshua Tree, memorial weekend in Dallas w/ Vance & Rosa, incredible road trip with dad up the CA coast, wineries, new restaurants, yummy food, my runs on the beach, the overlook where i go to "talk" to my mom, out of town visitors--Steve & Rachel, Amy, Johanna/Dave/Bailey/Ella, my cousin Sheryl, Stacey, Kelly & Mike--friends in LA who are now like family: sarah and the krogmanns (**thank u**), friends with new babies--margaret, beth, rachel & steve, eHarmony, boys--good dates and bad--crazy guys and commitment phobs, and even some liars, karaoke 34th bday, first of every holiday w/o my mom, first birthday w/o my mom, did i mention tears?!, from living on my savings to running out of money and remembering what poor feels like to being back at it, shopping sprees, fabulous new jeans, seeing who true friends are and more importantly who's not, growing up a bit and recognizing what i need for me and not settling for an ounce less, movies--lots of netflix, DEXTER, amazing moments with my nieces and nephews--they give me strength when they don't even realize it, 30 days with a black ribbon, dad not shaving, wires, tube, bad bad flashbacks, bad dreams, my mom sick, and full circle 2010 will always come back to mom, the year i lost my #1..

In conclusion, FUCK OFF 2010. Goodbye, don't ever rear your ugly head again.