365 days later

As the seasons change and we're coming up on the end of June I can't help by find myself reflecting on this time last year. I was mid stream packing up my 2BR apartment in Santa Monica that I was having a very hard time imaging leaving given all the emotions that were wrapped up in there. Yet I'll never forget on 6/29 when I spent the first night in my new place how I woke up and realized... I was now home. That I was finally starting a new chapter here in LA and it was finally beginning to feel like then one I first set out to start in 2009 when I arrived....before I suddenly lost my mom to Cancer.

And then on July 17th 2012 I adopted and brought home the most amazing dog in the entire world, KoKo. I remember saying to someone I know getting a dog will make me even happier with my life but I had no idea how much of an understatement that was. KoKo has made my life infinitely happier -- each day is filled with so much love and joy -- beyond anything I could've predicted or imagined. And in many ways I attribute my self growth and healing to his presence. The ability to allow myself to love something so much and trust that I can be this happy after having the one thing I loved and cared for most in this world ripped from my in a 6 week instant, my mom.

Then there's my birthday which happens to be one month from today and that always causes me to reflect back and think where I was this time last year and where I hope to be this time next year. I remember when I was in NOLA 2 summers ago and the tarot card reader said that my birthday year of 2011 would be filled with a lot of changes but all of them would lead to my birthday year of 2012 being the best year of my life. I thought that would mean I'd meet "my person" in 2012 but the reality is this past year was the best year of my life -- and all b/c of ME. I truly have created a life for myself that I love, following each and every conscious intention that I set for myself. And yes, one important piece is still missing, a partner to share it all with, but I truly believe he's yet to arrive because I needed to get to this place for me. I needed to make all these changes (city, career, apartment, etc) and find happiness and love again (via my latest addition of KoKo) in order to be fully ready to give and receive what a partner will add to my life. And that's been a pretty powerful thing to realize.

So despite some declarations I've made on this blog before that I'm ready and doing whatever it takes to attract my person -- I feel I can now truly say with 100% certainty that is the now the case. And wow what a wild ride the dating scene is but I'm trying to embrace it like you would any other roller coaster and know that in the end it will all have been worth it b/c it will leave me feeling something I've never felt before...and that's when I know I met my one.