i find myself at an interesting point of reflection as i sit to write this blog entry. today is the eve of february 13th, which is the date that forever changed my life. the date i lost my mom. and as i sit here and think how i can't believe it's been two years i also think about how much has happened to me in those two years. and today i think about how i just completed term two of three toward my coaching certification at the Hudson Institute...a huge step toward my future. so while this time of of year is a really difficult one for me, this year i was able to overcome some of that by knowing that i was spending the weekend learning and growing and painting another brush on the canvas i'm in the midst of creating for myself. the one i so wish i could show my mom when it's all finished. one that i'll wake up tomorrow wishing and pleaing to feel like the last 2 years were all a bad dream and she's really still here. but then quickly there after the reality will set back in and i'll realize i'm just left with the memories and and pictures. and while i'm so grateful to have 33 years worth of those...it's never enough when it's someone you love so immensely. but it's certainly enough for me to reflect back on to smile and feel grateful for the time i did have and the memories i'll always carry with me. life is interesting...and so is grief. i learn more and more as time passes it's a journey you're never quite past, one you only move through. and some parts are a lot bumpier than others. so in keeping with how i've survived these past two years, i try to embrace the bumps, feel what i need to feel in them, and then make my way through them and onto the next part, hoping it smooths out again. that's all we can do, right?!
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