adjustment in the making

So here I am -- living in my new apartment (pics enclosed). And after only a few days I've managed to turn it from an empty shell to a place that I can call home with all of my special things around. Of course all 40+ (!) picture frames have not found a home yet...but most things are put away and everything is fitting quite nicely (after I did about 4 runs to the Good Will to drop off a TON of stuff). And I already feel a sense of a renewal -- like so ready to unveil what the rest of 2012 holds for me and of course there after. I'm hopeful this home will bring many more happy times vs the last one and many more laughs vs tears. I've already had a few friends come by and so we're on our way. And tomorrow I have the dog adoption people coming by to do a "homecheck" so after that I'm officially in the system to apply for my labrador when the right one pops up. Can't wait.

Of course like with any transition you think back on your life during that time and where it was when you first began on that specific journey. So packing up to move out of what was my first apartment in LA brought back many memories of the summer of 2009, packing to leave my awesome condo in Phila and making the bold leap out west. I was SO happy and so full of hope and curiosity. And I had no idea what was in store just four months later w/ my mom. So after a long, long road, a road that still has tough turns and some forks in it, I in many ways feel back to the person I was when I first came here (allbeit a stronger and much more self aware version of me). So full of hope what this next chapter holds and so ready for a fresh start.

When I look back on the last (nearly) 3 years, b/c I feel I finally can say I'm looking back on most of it vs still very much IN it, I think to myself -- what led me here? How can others learn from what I had to go through? And as I've said before, I think the biggest thing is that I gave myself the time and space to work through it. I honored my feelings -- whatever they were. And most of the time they were feelings of sadness but I sat with them and in time slowly but surely the time it took for them to pass was a little bit less each time. But I still gave myself time and space. Because what started to happen was my mind was then able to free itself little by little to think about what could lie ahead. I gave myself time to unleash and tap into what's at my core and to consider two key questions -- who am I and what's the life I want to live. And I worked on gaining that clarity and then built a plan. And here I am, a year into it and feeling pretty on track and rather amazing overall!

So when life throws something our way that we weren't expecting -- take it and sit with it. Don't run, don't ignore, don't pretend like it will resolve itself. Instead think about it, cry, be mad, talk to someone, journal, take long walks -- just honor it. And I promise, you'll look back too at some point and say "when I look back..." because it too will feel behind you.