filled with inspiration

I just hung up with a good friend, gina, and we agreed how each time we talk we fill each other with inspiration. there's just a great spirt between us and i think we have always been incredibly supportive of each other's life goals etc so it's fun to stay connected. so happy to have her here in LA even if we don't see/talk as often as we'd like. so as it sit here on a beautiful sunday, i feel good. i feel filled with hope and inspiration for what lies ahead. and most of all, as i stated in my last post, i feel so grateful to feel this good. there was a time i just never thought the day would come and in many ways i can't believe it b/c it remains incredibly hard to live w/ the constant void of my mom but i'm finding a way to do it each day. so when i look forward i remain focused on how i can maintain a feeling of positivity, hope and inspiration. and part of what makes me feel that's possible is when i think about how i can help "pay it forward," how can i potentially help others find their way through a dark cloud, whether it be grief, love, life, career, who knows what. i would love to feel a greater sense of purpose in my life by helping others more. so i'm exploring that and seeing how to bring more of that into my life. and the thought alone makes me smile. i've always said i came to LA 2 years ago (2 years exactly on the 9th) searching for something more but i'm not sure i knew what it was. and after the last 18 months of battling back from such a tough place, i can't help but think that my experiences are pointing me toward something. so i'm remaining open to figuring out what that might be and i'm inspired by the thought of finally feeling back on track...gearing up to paint myself that new

canvas i told my mom i wanted to paint. so we'll see what the canvas reveals...but stay tuned as i think i'm onto something :) xo